“Susan sat down in a chair in our office, put her head in her hands and said, “I need you to help me get out. I am so miserable I don’t know what to do. I’m not doing the work I thought I would be and I’m not being the best parent I want to be either. I am taking client calls at 8 p.m. when I should be reading my kids a book before bed. I want a totally new career… I’ve been thinking about becoming a nurse or opening up a bakery.”

Susan is a top-performing partner at a prestigious New York law firm and is thoroughly unhappy. Many women lawyers come to us with similar stories, but the truth of the matter is that working at a large firm is hard, for men and women. With the demands of billing hours, committee meetings, servicing clients who want access 24/7, and bringing in new business, they often feel unhappy because they are surviving but not thriving at work. We find this to be the case even if a firm has progressive family friendly policies such as flex time and paid parental leave. In fact, women lawyers are particularly unhappy, and have told us that when they do take advantage of something like flex time, they feel they are marginalized onto a “mommy track” and penalized at compensation time. So although attempts to achieve work life balance may be helpful, we have seen firsthand, as well as from statistics, that women attorneys continue to be unhappy in law firms, and frequently leave before they make partner. By shifting the focus to what is meaningful about the work women lawyers do and what aspects of it make them happy, women can thrive in a law firm setting.”